The Catalyst
2012 :)

cause i haven’t opened tumblr since fall finals eheh

my resolution?

Afucking+

just had my 2nd buttrape (final) &blanking out my mind by tumblr-ing yezzzz

in the law lib, with chips. lmao i’m such a shit student

anyways,
buttfuckingrape.

it’s k; the 2 girls who got interns at Stikeman-Elliot found it retarded also.
safety. hah

3rd one tomorrow but i cba :)

mourir à petit feu… or a flamboyant one… either way, i’m dying from the inside

06:30 - 14:30 WORK
15:00 - 22:00 STUDY
22:00 PHO WITH HUBBY

what a productive day :>

23:00 HOME &THE SHOW GOES ON (studying)

since i’m not a Concordia student, simply a squatter (gym, eat, study, sleep there)& a tell-the-student-committee-to-lower-the-volume-on-their-event-because-“students are studying for finals &can’t hear themselves think”-when-i’m-not-even-a-“student”-there eheh… i can’t infiltrate the library building after 11pm when John Molson building locks down, now i hear MB opens at 6am….

i shall see you then, dear friend!

PS: but Concordia wishes it had students like me ;)

i slept so badly :(

kept half waking up every 5 minutes &felt such anguish

kept thinking “fuck i’ll never finish this paper, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck”

woke up 35min early to shower &get ready for the cocktail this evening, because i won’t have time after my last class
but then my dad was taking his sweet ass time in the bathroom &i only got to shower 25min later (which i could have spent trying to rest my head) &25min late to class

sighs, whatever.

after i hand in this paper on friday (hopefully before the deadline, not like last time, i was so worried…), i have 4 & a half days to study for my first final (no, i haven’t started a single thing, with this freakin’ paper); then a little less than 13 days to study for the last 4 finals that will be held within 3 days, until december 16.

hope it all works out

let’s race.

off to study zzz my face looks so old & tired :(
&BCBG blazer i forgot i bought… my new coat-jacket because XS somehow is loose&Zara high waist leggings&H&M ditsy print crop cardigan&BCBG purse
125/365
the aging process

well i haven’t had more than 6h of sleep a night for weeks, voire months…

i’m under a ton of stress from every aspect of my life at this point
but you couldn’t even tell :)

i seriously believe i’m losing a lot of hair from all this bottled up tension, wrinkles are forming on my forehead, my skin is less smooth & my shoulders hurt constantly. sans compter the inevitable shitbags under the eyes! (last semester when studying at a coffee shop on campus in Ottawa, i hear 3rd year law students say how Law School ages you… they knew their shit)

monday was thanksgiving; ohhh thanksgiving…. i studied 10 billion hours, k.

tuesday, i had 2 midterms, that is not all
wednesday, i had a 8h shift, then another midterm…

i repeat, 3 midterms & 8hours of work in 30some hours.
not so bad,

wonderwoman.

i wish, i wish…

midterms would have passed by now…

or wouldn’t come around for another month at least

or that it was still summer

or i could find it acceptable for me to have less than a maximum coursload (6)

or i could ever contemplate taking a semester off

i wish i didn’t need to worry so much about everything, i wish i didn’t need to study incessantly, i wish i’d stop getting older so fast, i wish time would just slow down, i wish everyone would not expect the most out of me all the time, i wish i didn’t have to take care of every problem on my own, i wish…

so happy!

i got to see my boyfriend little times today,
i studied h straight
i saw people i know at concordia
i found out yesterday that my paper did get accepted! (no first time 0% for me!)

&i gave a bunch to charity, which i’ve been meaning to do for a while now :) heh

worst eyebags of my life…..

there’s like one over the other.. the old one made a freakin baby :(

i slept so little all week sighs

thursday: was writing my paper in the morning (8-11am), then went to hubby’s &accompanied him to school (11-11:30), then took the bus to school &found my master, the library (i’m its bitch….. 12-1pm), had class (1-4), then back to the master’s (4-8), then i was supposed to go study at concordia &went to see hubby at net cafe, but i couldn’t stand being in a school anymore so i just skipped to hubby’s before him, then he came home &i studied until 1:30am :( ! zzz &i had to drive myself home omg… being on the road as a passenger makes me sleepy already.. it’s like a horror movie when i’m at the wheel at 2am… slept at 2:30

friday: woke up at 5am to continue writing that paper… left home at 6 something with daddy, got to school at 7:30, went to the lib &worked on that paper until 1pm when i printed it &got royally fucked in the ass by the printing machine !!
PS. my paper was due 12pm SHARP, not a minute later, said my professor… by the time i got to the secretariat, it was closed for the weekend… i slid it under the door, with a hundreth of an inch of hope; but i’m kinda sure they’ll trash it monday morning… did i mention i’ve been working on it for 3 weeks &it’s worth a fuckload?!??

sighhss…

went to hubby’s to get a little comfort food :( then had to run away because bedbug guys came to spray, then loitered around downtown for a bit, then bestie came to join, then we sat at Second Cup for a while, then the twins joined, then went back to my place, ate, photoshoot

around midnight, they were calling lifts to go home &twin#1 was going to eat with some friends &twin#2 wanted to go drink.. i wanted to drink too, to cheer up my shit ass studyful week, so instead of sleeping early like i planned since my previous 3h night, i went to a friend’s place at 1am…. he kept feeding us shots &mixed drinks & shisha, we were talking &talking, then i was seriously falling asleep! so he told me to take a nap before i drove home.. i was gonna leave around 2:30-3, then i KO’ed until 4am….. if me driving home sober at 2am is a horror movie, 4am with affected capacities &only 3h of rest in 48h is like…………………… let’s just say i legit fell asleep for 1 minute at 2 different red lights…. slept, uhm.. idk late

saturday: woke up at 7:15am, because i had a flight to Bay James with work at 9:30 &did not pack whatsoever…… our schedule was literally loaded from 12-10pm.. sighhhhh i KO’ed in the plane, then in the bus, then when the guide was making a presentation, then in the bus again.. &Hydro-Quebec stuffs its workers like a freakin’ xmas turkey.. like.. 4meals a day, i shit you not…. i fell asleep at 11something, finally :(

sunday: woke up at 7am &busy until 7pm &now i’m home, not studying when i should…

fmlfmlfmlfmlfml my face is decomposing by the day

ASGKLFDK STUPID PAPER!! fuck it, i play poker.